လမ္းအိုေလး

Løøps of Resistance …

Love is a Dog from Hell (Charles Bukowski)

မင္းက အမွန္အကန္ဆို မရဘူးေနာ္ ဘူေကာစကီး (စင္ၾကယ္ၿငိမ္း)

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ငါသိခဲ့သမွ်ေတာ့ ဇယားေတြ ဇယားအေဟာင္းေတြ
ေဂါက္သီးေတြ။ စူပါမားကက္ ေရာက္တဲ့အခါ ခပ္ေအးေအး
ခပ္ေျဖးေျဖး ေဆာ္ေလးေတြနဲ႔ ဘဲေတြကုိ ငါေတြ႕တယ္
လမ္းေတြေပၚ သူတို႔ အတူလိမ့္ေနတာ ေတြ႕တယ္
တိုက္ခန္းေတြထဲမွာ တူတူေတြ႕တယ္ သူတို႔ေတြ
ၿငိမ္းခ်မ္းစြာ အတူူေနၾကတယ္ သူတို႔ရဲ႕ ၿငိမ္းခ်မ္းမႈဟာ
အစအနေလးမွန္း ငါသိတယ္ ဒါေပမယ့္ အဲ့မွာ
ၿငိမ္းခ်မ္းမႈရိွတယ္ တခါတေလ နာရီပိုင္း
တခါတေလ ရက္ပုိင္းေပါ့

ငါသိခဲ့သမွ်ေတာ့ ေဆးစြဲတဲ့ဟာမေတြ အရက္စြဲတဲ့ဟာမေတြ
ဇယားေတြ၊ ဇယားအေဟာင္းေတြ၊ ေဂါက္သီးေတြ

မယ္သာဆုိးေတြ
တစ္ေယာက္ဒုိးရင္
တစ္ေယာက္ လာမယ္

ဝမ္းဆက္ဂါ၀န္ေလး၀တ္ၿပီး ခပ္သန္႔သန္႔ ခပ္ေအးေအး ေဆာ္ေလးေတြနဲ႔
ဒုိးေနတဲ့ ဘဲေတြ ငါေတြ႕တယ္
အဲ့ေဆာ္ေလးေတြၾကည့္ရတာ ကုိက္ခ်င္ခဲခ်င္တဲ့ပုံ ကုတ္ခ်င္ဖဲ့ခ်င္တဲ့ပုံ
မေပၚၾကဘူး

‘ငါဆီကုိ ဇယားတစ္ေဗြမွ ထပ္မ မလာနဲ႔ေတာ့’ေဘာ္ေဘာ္ေတြကုိ
ငါေျပာလုိက္တယ္ ‘ငါအဲ့ဟာမကုိ ခ်စ္မိလိမ့္မယ္’

‘မငး္က အမွန္အကန္ဆို မရဘူးေနာ္ ဘူေကာစကီး’

ငါလည္း အမွန္အကန္တစ္ေဗြ လုိခ်င္ပါတယ္ ေဟာဒီလက္ႏွိပ္စက္ထက္ကုိ
ငါစီးေနတဲ့ကားထက္ကုိ ေဆာ္အမွန္ေလးတစ္ေဗြ
ပုိလုိခ်င္တယ္ မုိးဇတ္တီးလုံး နားေထာင္ဖုိ႔ထက္ကုိ
ေဆာ္အမွန္တစ္ေဗြ လုိခ်င္တာ
အရမ္းလုိခ်င္ေနလုိ႔ ငါ
ေလထဲမွာ သူမရဲ႕အနံ႔ ရေနသလုိလုိ သူမကုိပဲ
ငါ့လက္ေခ်ာင္းေတြနဲ႔ ထိထားရသလုိလုိ ေရွ႕မွာေတြ႕ေနရတဲ့
ပလက္ေဖာင္းေတြလည္း သူမေလွ်ာက္ဖုိ႔ပဲ လုပ္ထားသလုိလုိ
ေခါင္းအုံးေတြကလည္း သူမအုံးဖုိ႔ပဲလုိလုိ
မရယ္ရေသးတဲ့ ငါ့ရယ္သံေတာင္ ငါၾကားလာသလုိလုိ
ေၾကာင္တစ္ေကာင္ကုိ သူမပြတ္သပ္ေပးေနတာ
သူမ အိပ္ေမာက်ေနတာ
ၾကမ္းေပၚမွာ သူမရဲ႕ ညွပ္ဖိနပ္ေလးေတြ ခ်ထားတာ ျမင္ေယာင္ေနသလုိလုိ

သူမ ရွိတာ ငါသိတယ္
ဒါေပမယ့္ ဇယားေတြခ်ည္း ငါ့လာလာကပ္ေနတဲ့ ဒီကမၻာမွာ
သူမ ဘယ္မလဲ

quiet clean girls in gingham dresses … (charles bukowski)

all I’ve ever known are whores, ex-prostitutes,
madwomen. I see men with quiet,
gentle women—I see them in the supermarkets,
I see them walking down the streets together,
I see them in their apartments: people at
peace, living together. I know that their
peace is only partial, but there is
peace, often hours and days of peace.

all I’ve ever known are pill freaks, alcoholics,
whores, ex-prostitutes, madwomen.

when one leaves
another arrives
worse than her predecessor.

I see so many men with quiet clean girls in
gingham dresses
girls with faces that are not wolverine or
predatory.

“don’t ever bring a whore around,” I tell my
few friends, “I’ll fall in love with her.”

you couldn’t stand a good woman, Bukowski.”

I need a good woman. I need a good woman
more than I need this typewriter, more than
I need my automobile, more than I need
Mozart; I need a good woman so badly that I
can taste her in the air, I can feel her
at my fingertips, I can see sidewalks built
for her feet to walk upon,
I can see pillows for her head,
I can feel my waiting laughter,
I can see her petting a cat,
I can see her sleeping,
I can see her slippers on the floor.

I know that she exists
but where is she upon this earth
as the whores keep finding me?


quiet clean girls in gingham dresses … – charles bukowski
[from Love is a Dog from Hell: Poems, 1974-1977 (1977), Black Sparrow Press]
ဘာသာျပန္ – စင္ၾကယ္ၿငိမ္း

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